Toil and Trouble

So, the past week has not been the greatest. Although I'm excited to be living in the Dallas area, there have been several times of sadness and home-sickness. I've been pretty stressed about support-raising and simply going on staff with NEXT. I'm trying to get into a rhythm when it comes to being at the office, hopefully finding a place to work out, and simply the ins and outs of the Metroplex. We know that we're supposed to be here, but still...

"You who have made me see many troubles and calamities will revive me again; from the depths of the earth you will bring me up again, you will increase my greatness and comfort me again." (Psalm 71v.20-21)

Now is one of those times that I feel that I'm walking through troubles and calamities, even though my troubles haven't been all that huge, compared to what many people go through. But, I can hold fast, like David, to the promises of a God who truly does raise us up from the depths of the earth.

It is at different points in times like these when I remember that sanctification is a process, one that sometimes involves quite a deal of pain and frustration. But, in the end, it is this process that refines us, through fire, to look more and more like the awesome one we serve, Jesus Christ. How I want to look like Jesus to this world!

May His glory be seen amidst all of the struggles that we, His children, are blessed to go through.

Pax per Pugna. Soli Deo Gloria.

Why? Oh, Why?

"For you are the God in whom I take refuge; why have you rejected me?" (Psalm 43v.2)

These words strike haunting chords in all of us, as humans. The very idea that a loving God could cause this kind of heartache baffles the majority of us and makes many a person stumble. In a world where so many, especially in the evangelical world, have associated following Christ with always being happy, as though Jesus were some kind of eternal high for our souls, this is a hard concept.

As Believers, we all walk the constant line of thinking for ourselves and our own selfish wants versus seeking God's face and what is bringing Him glory. Often times, our comfort and God's glory are quite opposite, colliding in one of those moments illustrated by crashing helmets on Monday Night Football. What we think is best runs right into that which God knows is best, leaving us to mutter, "I don't think God loves me. If He did, He would have given me..."

Here, in Psalm 43, is a sobering reminder that even those who are our spiritual heroes and sought God's face most had their trying times. David takes refuge in God, yet admits that he feels as though God has rejected him. There is yet another cross-roads in David's life: will he continue to persevere through the rough season, or will he fall into worshiping himself through trusting himself more than God.

In the season I'm in, right now, it can often seem like I'm saying "Why have you forgotten me, Lord?" And yet, through verses like this, I'm reminded that God will come through. This is a momentary season in the years of my life; years that I have committed, for a long time, now, to live in love to my Lord and my God. When things aren't working out the way we think they're supposed to, do we still worship? Who's plans are eternal - mine, or God's? The choice here is obvious... I am only living now in the temporary; I follow the Ancient of Days.